im getting worst

last nyte, i do my usual routine, on9 n watching tv until midnight (actlly till the early morn). 5 ppl chat wit me on fb, 3 on ym n theres 1 other through the phone...plus, replying all the comments... the notification just didnt stop from informing....my fingers gettin tired n sweats... the bones r gettin broken, the minds r gettin tired thinkin of words, my pair of eye chasing to read all the letters on the screen n keyboard. the mouse also get dizzy clicking... i think soon the keyboard will voice out "u just typing too fast n hard, im hurt!!!" hehehe..... while the mouse, "can u stop clicking too much buttons"...... well, actlly im such in rush...if its gettin slow, the mouse n keyboards will be the victim.... what a trash im talkin bout, i actlly wanna tell u what i felt last nyte....

OMG. OMG. OMG.........

thats only i can express for now...or for a few days coming.....

5 days before the day, historical, tragical, dramatical, emotical, n mostly remembered day of my life. 11 mac is haunting me dude!!! i cant get rid of it... factors~ all the form 5vers keep mentioning it on fb, many of my fren keep texting me (wishing n expressing feelings), the advertisements of announcements published here n there, its just sticked on my head Lah!!....

i feel sleepy, so i just went 0ff9, switching all electrical appliances n make sure evrything ok b4 i go upstairs to bed. i bring my latest issue of ujang n my phone with me. i enter my room and take the fm radio n press on traxx fm... so syokk...listening to hiphop n RnB songs.... really cheerin me up...while enjoying the songs, i read ujang... theres one joke about hantu "penanggal"...really funny.... but at the same time, i keep lookin around...who knows that the hantu "penanggal" will b mad at me bcoz of laughin at them...hahaha...nonsense thought.... suddenly i think bout the spm rslt... its coming on sudden ooo... i put the ujang down. the songs still playing on my ears... didnt focus on what is happening on reality on that tym...more on thinking n imagining...its so distracting n disturbing me... i really scared n i can feel my heart beating fast. my body getting weaker... it was a nightmare out of sleep.... i cannot sleep at all unti its gettin to 4 am....i went sleep for a few minutes but i wake up again, then thinking bout the result again...the actions repeat...i dont have any nightmare of my rslt (n hopping not)... so sleepy when i wake up this morning...my father yelling on my name...he just locked the gate n forgot something, it was 8 am...soooo sleepyyyy.... continue to sleep at the sofa...then, theres 1 man coming....asking 4 my father...he smiling at me (actlly he just wnt 2 laugh, i thought) looking at me....newly wake up face... then, after he go, i sleep again.... disturbance just coming again..... my sis just came home from skola agama.... i locked the gate, so, ill need to get up n just have to unlocked it.... ill sleep again!!! its repeated... untill its nearly to noon, i force myself to wake, its all bout the result thing last nyte.... i need to do the chore fast, as my parents will come back soon...n if the find out the house still on mess, im dead man... to sum up... the result will b out soon, no matter how im tryin to 4get n prevent it, it will come to me finally... so, accept the fate!!! regretting are useless... im a THINKER, IMAGINER.......hoping the best...n keep countdown...

p/s: ya Allah tngkanlah hatiku, berikan lah apa yg terbaik utk diriku.....